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This one is for the "Emotion" contest [link] held by [link]
I wanted to capture the emotions of someone who has found his soul mate and falls in love. I've chosen the photographer as the protagonist not only because the other submissions in my gallery are photographs, but mainly because artists tend to mix up their feelings with their artwork.
As for the story behind what I wrote... it does have alot to do with the one I love.
*The original title was "Love through the lens of a photographer"
I wanted to capture the emotions of someone who has found his soul mate and falls in love. I've chosen the photographer as the protagonist not only because the other submissions in my gallery are photographs, but mainly because artists tend to mix up their feelings with their artwork.
As for the story behind what I wrote... it does have alot to do with the one I love.
*The original title was "Love through the lens of a photographer"
Mature
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Comments10
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Overall Vision Originality Technique ImpactThis left me with a lingering sadness. I especially liked the last line, it really captured the ending like a snapshot. However, I felt the language used could be more clean. Sometimes it seemed choppy and words seemed out of place. For example:
Not that you use to fool around with every lady that undresses in front of your camera...
Of course that I wasn't carrying one with me...
As for the story, I enjoyed reading it and got caught up in the emotions of the protagonist. I also thought you had some nice descriptors of the woman. This was my favorite:
How nice, I thought, she's as beautiful as the sound of the word lilies.
Overall, I thought it was an emotional piece that was enjoyable to read and had an emotional impact; however I think it could do with some editing of the language.